(This is a story I wrote which was published in The Sunday Punch)

MAPANDAN,Pangasinan–"My world crumbled. They were everything to me.".

Wailing, Josephine Abellera , said this as she could not fathom why her only two children, Richard John, 7, and Ryan Christian, 6, drowned dead in Angalacan River near their residence in Barangay Baloling here.

Josephine, 42, married Rey, also 42, late in their mid 30s and were blessed with two children. Josephine alias Josie said their two children meant the world to them.

“Impabayes na Diyos labat manaya ya agano irayay anak ko ed siyak (God just
lent me my two kids for a while),” she told The PUNCH the other day (Nov. 7).

It was November 4 around 11:30 a.m, when their neighbors gave her her sons’ slippers after they drowned dead. She ran fast towards the river about 300 meters away
from her house in an effort to rescue them.

But, her sons were gone.

"Diad sakey labat ya momento, biglan alusbo su mundok (In an instant, my
world fell apart)," she tearfully said.

That tragic day, Richard John, a grade two pupil in Baloling Elemntary School
here, was to act as ring bearer in a wedding in Dagupan City.

He and his brother, a senior kindergarten in the same school, asked permission from their Mommy to take a bath. Josie, then preparing their things for the wedding, allowed them thinking that they were to take a bath at the water pump in their house. Too late did she learn that her sons went to the river for a bath, an act they never did before.

She recalled that it was only one time last May 1 when her husband came home
that their family went to the river for a bath and had a picnic there. They opted to celebrate Pista’y Dayat (Sea Festival), an annual affair in Pangasinan to celebrate the bounties of the sea, in the river to avoid huge crowd. Since then, the kids never returned in that area.

A four- year old playmate who is a relative of the victims, Aldwin Manaois, was with the two for the supposed bath. But because he could not go down the
river, he survived the tragedy. Shocked but was later able to talk, he was the one who told the sad news to his family.

Chief Inspector Leonardo Tamondong, police chief here said, they learned
about the tragedy and immediately went to the area.

With the help of concerned neighbors and the responding police, Richard’s body was recovered around 1:30 p.m. that same day.

Ryan’s was seen the following day around 8:30 a.m. along the river in Casibong, San Jacinto town.

Josie said she didn’t have any premonition about her kids’ untimely death.

She said when the news reached her, she went down the river in an effort to
rescue them and almost got drowned too, as the water was neck-deep. Her
cellular phone got soaked, too. Barangay folks prevented her from going far
and search for her drowning sons.

Feeling useless

She said she felt as if she is a useless mother unable to protect her sons.

“All the time, I was with them. I rode them in our trike bike going to and from school. People were used to seeing us three together anywhere anytime. Even while they were sleeping, I would watch over them,” she said in Pangasinan dialect.

She said she doesn’t know how her husband working as a heavy equipment mechanic in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia would react to her once he goes home. A relative
relayed the news to Rey and sent via fax message the death certificates of his sons so he would be allowed to go home.

Her husband requested not to bury his sons yet until he arrives home.

‘Our attention was focused to them. We want to give everything to them. They
are our world,” Josie said.

She said she blames herself for what happened but appealed to their
relatives, especially to her husband and his family to understand her.

She said it’s a good thing that people helped her get through this biggest
trial in her life by giving her advices on how to move on in her life.

“Amtak ya pagsubok labat ya na bilay pero grabe, ansakit ya maung (I know
this is just a trial in life, but it’s too much, it is so hurting),” she said
crying.

She said she is fighting her emotions and accept the fact that this is another mystery in one’s life.

Though she said her husband never hurt her physically, she said she is willing to accept if she would beat her this time because of what happened.

“Kailangan matatag ak anggan agko la amta no panon ak lamet ya ongapo ed
bilay. Wadtan ni asawak ya nepeg kon asikasoen (I should be tough although I
don’t know how to live again. My husband is still there for me and I should
take care of him),” she said.—Eva Visperas